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We’ve all been there, that moment where you throw your hands in the air because you just can’t take it anymore. In relationships, this is called “the straw that broke the camels back” moment. There’s a final thing that just causes you to boil over and give up on the relationship. Ive had these moments many times in relationships and called it quits. I stumbled across an article that described this moment perfectly and today I want to share that with you all. Perhaps it will help you save your relationships or better understand why past ones have failed. I know it did for me!
The article mentioned on the podcast: https://www.huffpost.com/entry/she-divorced-me-i-left-dishes-by-the-sink_b_9055288
So How Can I Prevent Breakups?
At the end of the day, I think we all understand that relationships take work. No one is going into any sort of relationship thinking it’s going to be a cake walk. If you ARE doing that, perhaps set the bar a tad bit lower. People make mistakes and nobody is perfect. Expecting things to be easy is setting yourself up for failure. However, that doesn’t mean that things HAVE to be difficult. As you’ve learned from my story in the podcast, that kind of thinking can make you stay in a relationship much longer than you should.
Instead, I think it’s important to go into any new relationship prepared. How do we do that? It’s pretty simple:
- Use the time that you are single wisely – this is a time for you to be on your own and to figure out a few things. Instead of focusing so much on finding the right person, focus on BEING the right person. This can help you attract the type of partner you want. I decided to date myself to do just that!
- Know what you want in advance – make a list of what you want out of the relationship. It’s helpful to go over this list with your therapist to make sure you’re not expecting too much, too little or where you might need to make improvements.
- Identify your red flags – these are your non-negotiables. When you see these red flags, you know to turn around and run away. Of course I don’t mean physically, but if someone shows you a red flag, it might be time to walk away before things get worse.
- Communicate, communicate, communicate – you’re going to have to talk to your partner. Be honest and open as much as you can at all times. Holding back, ignoring red flags or resenting them is only going to lead to disaster. It might be uncomfortable at first, but with the right partner, this can become much easier.
If you prepare in advance, you’ll set yourself up for success.
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